Gamera

It began when my friend sent this to me over Facebook:

My initial reaction: What the hell is this? Why is there a giant turtle named Gamera flying through space next to a flying saucer? Why is a chorus of children singing about his attributes? What's going on?

After a little digging, I discovered that Gamera started off as a Godzilla knock-off (not surprising). I know that Godzilla is the king of the monsters, but for some reason, Gamera just has more of an appeal to me. I mean, can Godzilla travel from place to place my turning into a flying saucer. I don't think so. Plus, I like the idea of a turtle kicking ass.

So Gamera's starred in a lot of movies. The first movies are more serious in tone. As the series continued, the budgets kept getting smaller and smaller, and the plots became more and more identical and cheesy (the plot of at least 4 of the Gamera movies: 1. a new monster shows up. 2. Gamera fights it. 3. Gamera gets injured. 4. Gamera needs to heal. 5. Gamera heals. 6. Gamera kicks the monster's ass and everyone's happy).

Let's go through some Gamera films now!

Gamera: A Bloggy Retrospective

(Note: I haven't seen some of the movies in a while, and honestly, they start blurring together, so the reminiscences will be brief and potentially vague.)

Gamera (1965)

The very first Gamera movie. It's the only one in black and white and the only film in which Gamera is the villain (but it's not his fault, it's MAN'S!). We've got themes of why nuclear war is bad. Learning lessons. There's also some great Gamera Arctic ship destruction stuff happening.

Gamera vs. Barugon (1966)

The very first sequel. Again, more serious in tone. This is the first film in which Gamera becomes an ally of mankind.

If I took anything away from this movie, it's this: don't take forbidden eggs. I know it's tempting, and you think it's a giant pearl or something, but it's not. It's a monster egg. And that monster's going to hatch and shoot rainbow death rays (they don't show them in the trailer, so lame) at everyone. It's not worth it.

Gamera vs. Gyaos (1967)

A little less serious in tone.

Gamera saves an annoying tubby kid from a bat monster. I don't really understand why Gamera saved him because the kid was really annoying. Really, really annoying.

Gamera vs. Viras (1968)

This is a Gamera movie I haven't seen yet, but not for lack of trying (damn you, Netflix!). Listen to that swinging 1960s score! The monster is a weird alien squid thing! We get to see Gamera underwater! Taking it to a whole other level.

For some reason I have a feeling this is the Gamera movie where he crosses over into Camp Camp.

Gamera vs. Guiron (1969)

In this clip, Gamera uses gymnastics to defeat his shark monster foe. Oh the quality of storytelling. Where did it go?

Gamera vs. Jiger (1970)

This is the worst one. I blocked out most of the experience because the film was so terrible. I only really remember 2 things from this movie: 1. It takes place during some sort of World Fair. 2. One of the characters has a Hitler-y mustache.

Even though the Gamera movies get really bad, I have a hard time not being obsessed with them. I have accepted Gamera into my life. I even have a Gamera I can call my own.

Gamera faces off against a new foe. Taking bets.

I don't feel too bad about my Gamera love. Mystery Science Theater 3000 is just as obsessed as I am. Maybe even a little more so.